Movie Review: Safety is not guaranteed

Safety is not guaranteed sucked, sucked and SUCKED!!

Redbox - I want my $1 back!

What am I thankful for?

While everyone is posting what they are thankful for on facebook, I thought I would share mine here. For my stalkers fans.

First, and most importantly, I am so thankful I am not spending Thanksgiving with my in laws. 

SO THANKFUL! 

S. never really liked spending time with his family. I always encouraged it saying "Life is too short, you never know when this is your last holiday together".

Honestly, I see why he didn't want to spend time with his family.

I get it.

And S. - I'm sorry for encouraging you to spend time with them.

I am thankful for my family. I don't know where I would be without them. 

Honestly, I know where I would be. I would be dead. I would have taken my own life by now.

Seeing what S.'s suicide did to my family, is the only thing that got me through my roughest times. I couldn't do that to my family.

I am especially thankful for my mom. Most times my mom doesn't know how to help me, but she TRIES. Unlike a lot of people in my life. At least my mom gives a damn and tries. My mom is my best friend, and I swear to budda, we are soul sista's.

My brother is amazing. He is my secret body guard, that would kick the shit out of anyone that messes with me. I remember when he was born. I was so pissed off at my mom for not giving me a sister. She brought home a brother. What kind of shit is that?! I am thankful for my brother. If he was a sister, I probably would have shanked him by now.

My dad is loving and supportive, in his own, shy, way. I love my dad. I'm pretty sure I am his favorite daughter. I feel bad for any dude that ever physically hurts his daughter, because the dude won't have a chance to make it to prison before my dad gets his hands on him.

I am thankful for my best friend, Jenny. When S. died, she was there through it all. We sat on my porch for probably a good 6 months straight after he died. She didn't understand what I was going through, but was there, none the less. I know no matter what, I can depend on her. And I am forever in-debt to her. I hope I never get the chance to pay her back.

I am thankful for the life S. and I had together. The love we shared.

The lessons S.'s love taught me. 

And the lessons his death has taught me. 

Then I am thankful for being alive. I do have mornings when I wake up, roll over, and think "Are you fucking kidding me? How am I still alive??" Even though life sucks balls sometimes, I am thankful I am alive, and get to live this life with people that love me.

I am thankful for food on the table, a lil cash in my wallet, a car, a good job, and roof over my head.

I am thankful for coffee. Especially with cinnabun creamer.

I am thankful for lip gloss. And make up. And cute clothes. My dogs. Glitter. My cell phone - aka - grand central station. Naps. A full nights sleep. Snow. Lilies. And spring.

I am thankful for having the internets in my home. Where I can read and research as much as I want, without having to worry about the consequences of my actions. I think we take this luxury for granite. There are countries that have facebook blocked. 

I am thankful that I don't live in a country where widows are shunned and forced to live a life alone and in misery. Some cutlers – widows are killed, simply because their husband died. 

I am thankful for my widow friends. Oh, how they have helped me through the most trying times. Especially times that “none widowed” people don't understand. I am thankful that they are always a call, text, email, or click away.

I am thankful that S. and I did not successfully conceive a child, even though we tried.

There, I said IT. 

I am happy we didn't have child together, and I am thankful that I don't have to try to explain to my child what happened to his/her dad. Seeing my suicide widows struggle with telling their child the honest to god truth about their dad, is gut wrenching. How do you explain to a child that their dad chose to leave this life?

I am thankful for Steve Madden's shoes. Guess. Juicy Couture. Bubble baths and hot running water. My fucking amazing bed!

I am thankful that I have a boss that understands when I call him and say - I need a break, I'm not coming to work. In turn, I am thankful for vacation pay. Where I can take time off as I please, and still get paid.

I am thankful for the 10 years I did have with S. I wouldn't trade anything for that time. Even if it meant I could trade my pain for that 10 years.. I wouldn't do it. I would do it all over again, in a heartbeat.

A friend posted this, and I am stealing it. It rang so true, and I never thought about how I love being independent, and alone.

I am thankful that I have the life skills to live an independent life. If I want to live somewhere, I do it, If I want to travel, I go, If I want something, I buy it. I don't have to discuss, argue or barter with another person to have any of my needs and wants met. That being said, I know firsthand when you are in a good relationship none of that matters. I also know when you are in a bad relationship that it is all that matters. So since I am in neither I will say I am grateful that I am free to live and run my life the way I want and if I ever meet someone else, he better respect that!

Most of all, I am thankful that this Thanksgiving, I am thankful. Being thankful is something that was ripped away from me. Years past, I didn't have anything to be thankful for, other then - I'm glad S. didn't kill me too.

This year, I am thankful just to be thankful.

Happy Thanksgiving friends!

Movie Review: The Campaign

Long story short, I am disappointed with The Campaign.

Will Ferrell is far funnier then the movie portrays.

But smack my ass funny moment -
I shaved the dog and glued the fur to my nut sack, so I would look like a grown man.

2012 twinkies are going out of business-
And the movie even had twinkies in it! 20 years from now, "kids" are going to say - "What the fuck is that big, yellow, nasty looking thing, that he is sucking on??"

2 stars

Movie Review: Paranormal Activity 4

Paranormal Activity 4 was horrible.

It wasn't scary. At.All.

It got scary the last 10 minutes the abruptly ended.

The first Paranormal Activity 4 was the best yet.

Wait for it to come out on cable.
Don't waste your money or anticipation.

Movie Review: That's My Boy

"That's my boy" is insanely funny!

I love the part that the groom comes home from his bachelor party, kicks his shoes off, as they make a huge thud sound on the floor.
He then bends over and says "Shh.." to his shoes! I died laughing!
I'm going to do that to my shoes next time I come home shit faced.

Probably one of the funniest movies I have seen this year.

I highly recommend watching it, but it's not for kids. And kids I mean 18 years and younger.

Bravo!

Movie Review: The Sessions

I went to the pre-screening for The Sessions last night.

The friend I went with wrote this review, said I could steal it. He puts it perfectly!!

The Sessions was one of the most touchingly sweet movies I've seen recently.  A man stricken with polio and confined to an iron lung has the chance to change his life by working with a sex surrogate.   It was by turns sweet, awkward, sincere, heartbreaking, and above all, imbued with a sense of humor about life’s challenges and rewards.  Bring some tissues!

The only thing I want to add is seeing Helen Hunt totally nude was a shock to me. But she looks good!
Warning, there is a lot of nudity.

5 stars!!

Report Card

I had a dream about S.

It goes -
I was getting in the shower, and he comes into the bathroom.
He says "Do you have my report card?"
I say "What report card?"

"You know, the one that showed I had a 4.0 and was graduating a year early?"

Me "No, I didn't keep that."
S. "Why?"
Me "Because you are dead, why would I have kept it?"
S. "Because I wanted it!!"
Me "You are DEAD! What in the hell do you need your report card for?"

To which S. looks at me like I am insane.

I then wake up.

I will never forget December 23rd, 2010.
I was supposed to be watching S. graduate college a year early with a 4.0.

Instead I was facing the fact that he took his own life, and facing my first Christmas without him.

PS: If he asks about his report card, I still have no idea what he is talking about. Please explain to him he doesn't need a report card in heaven.