Written February 25th, 2011
Yesterday I went to see a psychic. Her name is Debbie, I highly recommend her. Her phone # is 801-942-4002. She is at 1421 East Fort Union Blvd.
The session started out with her asking me to make two wishes, and not tell her what they are. I wished for happiness and direction.
The first thing she said was that I am a demanding person, and things are my way or the highway. She said I have lost some relationships due to that.
She said there is a man in my life that thinks the world of me, and loves me, but I am unsure how I feel about him. (True).
She asked what is the pain, frustration, and jealousy that my family has against me. I said I’m pretty sure there isn’t any in my family. I don’t fight with my family. She said they are talking behind my back about how bad of a person I am and about all the wrong decisions I have made. I said this can’t be about my family, it has to be about S.’s family. She said they blame me for something, and it was something I had no control over. I explained that weeks after S.’s death, they told me it was my fault he killed himself. She said they are very angry with me, and believe it is my fault. She said there is two of S.’s siblings that want a relationship with me, and have been trying to reach out to me. One is a sister and one is a brother. The brother has been standing up to the family for me, and telling them look.. we never gave S.'s wife a chance when S. was alive, it’s time we give her a chance. She said there is a step sister or sister in law, that has always been very jealous of me, and does not like me. She said they are toxic, and draining the life out of me.
I asked her about S... asked why it happened. She asked if drugs were involved, and I said not that I know of, the toxicology showed none in his system.. but he was on prescription drugs.. she said that’s why she feels sedated. She said he felt like everything he did, he failed at. That everything kept blowing up in his face. He felt like his friends and family never cared enough to get to know the new (bipolar) S., and didn’t care about him. He felt like he couldn’t talk to me about it, because I was increasingly frustrated with his bipolar. He felt like I would get frustrated and mad at him, and he didn’t want to put me through anymore pain. He was in a lot of pain, I was in a lot of pain, he was tired of seeing me suffer, and decided it was the best outcome for both of us.
She said he doesn’t blame me, has no anger towards me, and there is nothing I could have done differently.
She said that he is with me every second of every day, that he never leaves my side. I asked her if he sends me signs, she said he does, but he says I don’t notice them. She said he turns on and off electronics and turns the volume up and down. He turns lights on and off. If I have lost something, he puts it in a place I will find it. Normally the place I have looked a million times, thinking that’s where I left it.. he will move it to that place.
(back story.. I couple weeks ago I had the stereo in my car randomly turn the volume up. Last weekend, I had my TV acting up. The screen would go green, then turn off, then turn back on. It did that like 4 times, and I was thinking that’s effing great, I need to buy a new TV now??)
She said I have a lot of guardian angels. She said one was assigned to me when I was born. I have one that seems to be a great grandma or great aunt that I took care of in her last years on earth. (That is my grandma p.). She said my grandma has been trying to force me to go to a psychic for months, but I kept chickening out and didn’t have the guts to go (SOOO true). She said that my grandma made certain that I went yesterday, she forced me to go. I felt like I had to go, for direction.. so I guess that explains that.
I asked her about the afterlife, is there is one, and where S. is. She said there is a heaven, there isn’t a hell.. but there is a place in between heaven and earth. She said S. is in that in-between place. She said because he committed suicide, he has to basically prove to god that he deserves to go to heaven that suicide is never in god’s plan. She said S. is scared, lost, and doesn’t know how to get to heaven. She said I can help him by telling him to go to the light. Telling him I don’t need him here anymore. She said that she can feel how much S.loves me, and the amount of love he has for me takes her breath away, and is some of the most intense love she has ever felt.
She said I need to change careers. She said that the place I am working, I am at the top of the ladder, and will never advance. She said I am not happy working there, and need to do what makes me happy. She said she thinks I should quit my job, and do photography or go to school to be a vet tech. That she can see how much I love animals. When she said that, I almost fell out of my chair. Being a vet tech is my dream job, and I have been putting it off because.. well I don’t know why. I didn’t tell her those were my dream jobs. She said she wants me to go to school for a vet tech. That through my new job, I will meet the “one” I am supposed to marry. She said I will meet him between now and the next two years. He will be 7” taller than me, have blue or hazel eyes, with dark hair. That he will be financially stable, so I can be a vet tech, and not worry about how little of money I will make doing that. She said we will have a daughter, and son. She said once I have my dream job, and meet the one, everything will fall in place.. that I will be the happiest I have ever been, S. will finally be happy, and we will all feel at peace.
She said my family will be safe and happy. That there is no health problems coming up for me. She said I need to get a handle on my anxiety and panic attacks, and I need to have my blood pressure checked, and keep an eye on it for the rest of my life. She said I would live a long healthy life if I did that.
She said we can help S. pass over faster by praying. We ended the session by lighting a candle, and praying. She said he should pass over within 3 days, that by the 4th night I should be able to sleep without medication. Once I can sleep without medication, is how I will know he has passed over.
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